Shiver me timbers

Bath is still reeling from the society event of the season – my house's pirate party. Aaaaarrr. It was a rather confusing party because everyone was dressed the same – white shirt, black trousers, evil-looking weapon, red headscarf, rum stains – a situation made more confusing after everyone had had their share of Grog and Pugwash Punch. Readers, I did not drink, instead spending the evening half hoping that no one would break anything/wee in the piano/die/offer crack to the neighbours/declare war on the Spanish navy, and half hoping that I would be able to put my new Future Publishing-sponsored first aid skills to good use. I have a proper green first aid box from the pound shop now!

Anyway, Nick, our very own Blackbeard, turned up, as did Andrew "Adam Ant WAS a pirate" Gregory, as shown here.

Captain Hook...

...and Tinkerbell

Sadly, Mike took so much time preparing his captain's parrot costume that he forgot to show up. Either that or he was being a pirate in the best way he knows how – staying in his bedroom playing dodgy warez games.

Speaking of gaming, I hope to mollify any readers angered by the production errors I let slip through in LXF77 (noooooooooooooooooo) by the fact that not only does my house have a working arcade machine (running legal Roms, natch) it also has a Tux poster proudly displayed in the background.