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nelz
Moderator
Joined: Mon Apr 04, 2005 12:52 pm
Posts: 8002
Location: Warrington, UK
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 Posted: Sun Dec 12, 2010 6:42 pm Post subject: |
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| Dutch_Master wrote: | I've yet to find a bank that communicates with fish...   |
Dogger Bank?
_________________
Unix is user-friendly. It's just very selective about who it's friends are. |
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Bazza
LXF regular
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 11:16 am
Posts: 1381
Location: Loughborough
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Rhakios
Moderator
Joined: Thu Apr 07, 2005 12:18 am
Posts: 7473
Location: Midlands, UK
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| Posted: Sun Dec 12, 2010 9:42 pm Post subject: |
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Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Am I in luck just lately:
| Quote: |
Attn:ATM card winner,
This email will come to you as a surprise.The Automated teller machine
inc.(ATM) have chosen your name/email randomly by the board of trustees
through a computerized random ATM ballot system as one of the final
recipients for the 2010 ATM grant promo.
The promo was sponsored by the Automated machine inc.(ATM)/multi-million
groups of companies to promote the use of ATM cards,and to improve the
standard of living globally,by giving out once in a "LIFE TIME CASH GRANT
PROMO" ATM Card Value USD ($850.000.00) Eight Hundred And Fifty Thousand
United States Dollars, to 5 lucky recipients respectively,for the year
financial grant promo,in accordance with the enabling act Parliament world
development programme.
You have been granted an International ATM platinum card value USD
($850.000.00).To secured the release of the ATM CARD you must call and email
the assigned agent
below with your
FULL NAME:________________________
RESIDENTIAL ADDRESS:______________
OCCUPATION:_______________________
NATIONALITY:______________________
PRESENT COUNTRY:__________________
AGE:_______________________________
SEX:_______________________________
TELEPHONE NUMBER:________________
FAX NUMBER:_______________________
ONCE AGAIN CONGRATULATIONS.....
(PAYMENT REMMITANCE AGENT)
Mr.Udeh Daniel
E-Mail: <udeh.daniel39@live.co.uk>
TEL:+234-803-928-8280
THE ATM CARD PAYMENT CENTER HAS BEEN MANDATED TO ISSUE OUT AN ATM CARD, WHICH
YOU WILL USE TO WITHDRAW MONEY IN ANY ATM MACHINE,FROM ANY PART OF THE
WORLD.Note always quote your (ATM CASH GRANT NUMBER: FA/3956/NG) in all your
emails.
NB: Information contained in this email is intended for the use of addressee
only, and is confidential. Any dissemination, distribution, copying or use of
this communication without the prior permission of the addressee is strictly
prohibited. If you are not the intended recipient of this communication you
should destroy it
without copying.
Best regards,
Mrs.Ash orch
Director of ATM Inc
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Now, I was worried about sharing this with you all, until I noticed that it only requires "the prior permission of the addressee", and that's me! If it had required the permission of the originator, obviously I couldn't have shared it with you. 
I'm not sure if Mrs Ash has been orchestrated, or is in fact an orc who can't spell.
I'm also not sure why Udeh has to use a live.co.uk email address either, given that he works for Automated teller machine inc. Oh well.
_________________
Bye, Rhakios |
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Bazza
LXF regular
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 11:16 am
Posts: 1381
Location: Loughborough
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| Posted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 6:23 pm Post subject: |
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Hi Rhakios...
FULL NAME: Lucky Sucker.
RESIDENTIAL ADDRESS: 41 The Street, Toytown, Lapland.
OCCUPATION: Winning ATM Lotteries.
NATIONALITY: Laplandian.
PRESENT COUNTRY: Lapland.
AGE: 5.
SEX: None of your business.
TELEPHONE NUMBER: Moo Bar Double Quack Double Quack.
FAX NUMBER: None.
There we are, filled in and posted.
_________________
73...
Bazza, G0LCU...
Team AMIGA... |
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Rhakios
Moderator
Joined: Thu Apr 07, 2005 12:18 am
Posts: 7473
Location: Midlands, UK
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| Posted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 7:33 pm Post subject: |
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| Bazza wrote: | Hi Rhakios...
FULL NAME: Lucky Sucker.
RESIDENTIAL ADDRESS: 41 The Street, Toytown, Lapland.
OCCUPATION: Winning ATM Lotteries.
NATIONALITY: Laplandian.
PRESENT COUNTRY: Lapland.
AGE: 5.
SEX: Yes please!
TELEPHONE NUMBER: 5138008
FAX NUMBER: None.
There we are, filled in and posted. |
Edited for better amusement value. 
_________________
Bye, Rhakios |
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1slipperyfish
Forum Jester
Joined: Mon May 09, 2005 3:52 pm
Posts: 2366
Location: wigan
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| Posted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 10:06 pm Post subject: |
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| Rhakios wrote: | | Bazza wrote: | Hi Rhakios...
FULL NAME: Lucky Sucker.
RESIDENTIAL ADDRESS: 41 The Street, Toytown, Lapland.
OCCUPATION: Winning ATM Lotteries.
NATIONALITY: Laplandian.
PRESENT COUNTRY: Lapland.
AGE: 5.
SEX: Yes please!
TELEPHONE NUMBER: 5138008
FAX NUMBER: None.
There we are, filled in and posted. |
Edited for better amusement value. |
i find your edit a bit uncouth 
paul
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i am a follower of the culture
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Rhakios
Moderator
Joined: Thu Apr 07, 2005 12:18 am
Posts: 7473
Location: Midlands, UK
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| Posted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 10:40 pm Post subject: |
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From you, I'll take that as a compliment.
_________________
Bye, Rhakios |
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nelz
Moderator
Joined: Mon Apr 04, 2005 12:52 pm
Posts: 8002
Location: Warrington, UK
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| Posted: Wed Dec 15, 2010 6:05 pm Post subject: |
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Sometimes it seems they just can't be bothered doing it properly. I just got this one, there was nothing else, not even a subject header.
| Quote: | Your Mail ID has won £1,000,000.00 (ONE MILLION POUNDS). in the Uk Award PROMO. Send
Names.
Nationality.
Tel. |
_________________
Unix is user-friendly. It's just very selective about who it's friends are. |
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jjmac
LXF regular
Joined: Fri Apr 08, 2005 2:32 am
Posts: 1996
Location: Sydney, Australia
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| Posted: Sat Dec 18, 2010 9:16 am Post subject: |
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I haven't seen any of those above but i have inherited 30 million pounds a couple of times from just about to die old widows. Would it not be funny to find out years later that those ones were actually on the level
Ododo --- (grin), possibly a real name hehe.
jm
_________________
http://counter.li.org
#313537
The FVWM wm -=- www.fvwm.org -=-
Somebody stole my air guitar, It happened just the other day,
But it's ok, 'cause i've got a spare ... |
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Rhakios
Moderator
Joined: Thu Apr 07, 2005 12:18 am
Posts: 7473
Location: Midlands, UK
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| Posted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 11:17 pm Post subject: |
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Thread resurrection time!
My junk mail address got this one today:
| Quote: |
Our official code: (811).
Good news after our board meeting the federal government of Nigeria has mandate us to deliver your fund to you in your country through diplomatic channel (FACE TO FACE) you will receive $2.8millon dollars Cash in your country and it is revealed that your email is among the list of people who have never received any of their payments among lottery, inheritance, compensation and awarded contract funds and victims who have lost a lot of money to scammers while trying to claim their funds.please show your readiness and Reconfirm your information bellow For Identification on diplomat arrival so that i will send you the airway bill of the consignment/box NOTE: DO YOU WANT BANK TO BANK TRANSFER?
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Things I like about this: their reference code 811, is that just a typo for 911? Their reason for sending me the mail, that my name appears among those who have never received such largesse, or have been suckered before. Really, the people who send these out have a fine sense of humour! 
_________________
Bye, Rhakios |
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1slipperyfish
Forum Jester
Joined: Mon May 09, 2005 3:52 pm
Posts: 2366
Location: wigan
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| Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2012 10:16 am Post subject: |
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i got one from berklays bank saying i should send them my log in details as there may be a fault with my ackount??
paul
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pastychomper
Joined: Wed Apr 07, 2010 11:54 am
Posts: 36
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| Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2012 10:52 am Post subject: |
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Someone tried to scam me like that in real life once. I'd been fishing in a stream and he said he was out doing field work looking at the local microfauna. Being a bit of a biologist myself, I stopped to talk to him, but things took a strange turn when he saw a little bug clinging to my boot. I thought it was a water beetle, but he insisted it was actually a very rare kind of primitive sheep parasite, and that there was a cash reward for anyone finding a specimen. Then he kept asking for my name and bank details so we could 'split the proceeds.'
Of course I wasn't fooled for a minute - I threw the creature back into the water and left, telling him it was the oldest tick in the brook. |
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Ram
LXF regular
Joined: Thu Apr 07, 2005 10:44 pm
Posts: 1552
Location: Guisborough
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| Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2012 5:16 pm Post subject: |
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| pastychomper wrote: | Someone tried to scam me like that in real life once. I'd been fishing in a stream and he said he was out doing field work looking at the local microfauna. Being a bit of a biologist myself, I stopped to talk to him, but things took a strange turn when he saw a little bug clinging to my boot. I thought it was a water beetle, but he insisted it was actually a very rare kind of primitive sheep parasite, and that there was a cash reward for anyone finding a specimen. Then he kept asking for my name and bank details so we could 'split the proceeds.'
Of course I wasn't fooled for a minute - I threw the creature back into the water and left, telling him it was the oldest tick in the brook. |
You should have let him have it - the tick that is - he may then have got limes instead of cash.
_________________
Ubuntu LXDE 12.04 running on AMD Phenom II*4; ASUS Crosshair III Formula MB; 4 GB Ram.....
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leke
LXF regular
Joined: Mon Oct 22, 2007 6:45 pm
Posts: 479
Location: Oulu, Finland
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| Posted: Thu Jul 19, 2012 1:04 am Post subject: |
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I liked this one so much, I saved it...
| Quote: | I want you to read this message very carefully, and keep its content
secret till further notice, you have no need of knowing who I am, where am
from, till I make out a space for us to see, I have been paid €30,000
in advance to terminate your existence with some reasons not listed in my
contract by my employer, this employer is one you may call family, I have
been in close surveillance for one week and three days now and have seen
that you may be innocent, which really is not for me to decide.
Note that for your safety do not think of contacting the police
or try to send a copy of the message to them, because seeing an alert on
this massage will force me to do what I do not intend doing (Believe me it
will seem like an accident to even the police forensics) As this is the
first time I am betraying a client, I will be needing a retirement fee from
you to return to my country ASAP as I can not stay any longer in your
country after this.
Now, listen very carefully I will arrange a location for you to pick up
tapes and pics of me and my employer for court evidence, and also meet
with you face to face if you promise you won’t involve the police.
Contact this email within 48hrs as I do not have much time.
hitman123193@gmail.com
Be careful of who you think you are showing this massage to, we are
watching and listening to every move you make.
You don’t need my phone contact for now till am assured you are ready to
comply good. |
I feel so privileged to get a second chance at life
_________________
I codes here: http://notsure.tk |
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Bazza
LXF regular
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 11:16 am
Posts: 1381
Location: Loughborough
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2012 10:19 pm Post subject: |
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Hi pastychomper...
"Of course I wasn't fooled for a minute - I threw the creature back into
the water and left, telling him it was the oldest tick in the brook."
GGRROOAANN...
_________________
73...
Bazza, G0LCU...
Team AMIGA... |
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